Woes of a Writer

Yesterday was HOT! Oh my goodness gracious, I’m surprised to still move about, it’s incredible . Well, on my free time, I’ve been trying to work on my fanfictions but it’s coming out rather slow. Wrote only two and a half pages for a Ulqui/Ruki fic I have. I’ve been wrestling to find a meaningful purpose to drive the story along and it suddenly hit me yesterday. So I’m doing progress, thankfully. AoM fans want to kill me, I’m sure. I take forever for the updates… and there’s no reason to because the 14th chapter is finished and all I need to do is type it and edit it. I have internet now to help me so I have no excuse, they’d say. But I blame it on the heat. It slows me down like molasses.

I’ve been watching Soul Eater, just got ten or so eps to finish watching the series. Might end up reading the manga after I’m done. It’s a very good anime. Don’t be surprised if I write a post or two about it. I should. My blog is getting really lame these days. All I’ve been doing is working on the other sections. XP. Oh well. Need to work on interesting posts in general.

Another fic that I’ve been tackling extra hard is SoF (Spirit of Flight), It’s one of my personal favorites next to AoM. I’m doing a total revision to the second chapter and it’s taking forever. And if that’s not enough, I lost the document and so I’m working with a back up that hasn’t been updated. I’ve printed out a hard copy of sections of the original lost docuement, but it’s so mendokusei to work to try to remember and fit between what I have and what I have to re-write from scratch. That alone, just knocks the wind out of me. I want to get this chapter finished because I occupies my mind. I can’t seem to be able to work on anything else devoitedly because I’m always thinking about getting it done.

Another fic that’s been bugging me is “Garden Bird”. There’s a whole bunch of crap I have to type up. A chapter and some pages of a small pre-chapter section called the KGC (Konoha Gossip Corner). That part is so fun to write! *squeals*. I need to do a significant amount of editing in that one, so much so that I can’t start working on the next chapter of that fic, until I type it up and print it out… and that pisses the hell outta me… *fumes*

Lately my rough drafts have been very messy. They’re filled with so many revision errors, like switching sentences around and adding unique synonyms. Expanding scenes adding more descriptions… It gets me so upset. Why? Because, when you see that I update a chapter on any story, I’m usually at least, one chapter ahead. When I have chp 1 of a fic posted for the readers, I’m writing chap 3 or 4 at that moment. I rely heavily on my previous chapters to push the storyline along. So much so, that I often quote dialogue from the previous chapters to provide emphasis and also to remind the readers what happened at that previous moment, since so much goes on in a story. I don’t mind if I have tons of spelling, grammar, or punctuation errors, because that doesn’t directly affect the content of the story. I read over the drafts and can quickly proceed to writing the next chap. But when there’s revision errors, that stops me dead in my tracks. Because I need to switch sentences, add new material and that makes it extremely difficult to continue writing the next chappie. I have to type it (that’s when I revise it) and make the changes, print it out and THEN, I can keep working on the story.

It pisses me off. Pisses me off, so badly. I have to do that for SoF, Garden Bird and Sober State (Gintama fic). Three stories! That’s enough to drive me insane! Unfortunately, it’s not letting me concentrate too well on writing other chapters in general. I want to write a one-shot Neji/Hina because my two current Neji/Hina fics (SoF, Garden Bird) are both stuck in that rut, and I need to write a scene with them because my mind is screaming for it. (I’m such a dire-hard fan of that couple, it makes people sick XP). But I can’t. I have a block. And I know why. It’s because I need to stop beating around the bush, and start typing those shits already. Damn, I’m so lazy when it comes to typing! I love, love, LOVE to write the chapters—but when I have to type them up… it’s so medokusei… ugh man!

For those reading this post, thanks… at least you have an idea on what goes through the mind of a fellow writer. *laughs*

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